Top 13 Reasons why Halloween is Better than Christmas

13. Marshmallow ghosts

12. Roasted pumpkin seeds

11. Mr Bones candy in the plastic coffin

10. Putting out a masked scarecrow in a chair on the front porch two weeks before Halloween, replacing the scarecrow with yourself on Halloween night and waiting for the neighborhood kids to knock on the door

9. Dressing like your favorite sci-fi/fantasy character without 'outing' yourself as the supreme geek that you are

8. The kids don't really need to eat all that candy, but it's such a shame to waste it...

7. Carving pumpkins

6. It majorly freaks out the fundamentalists, but Wal-Mart supports it wholeheartedly (although there is some concern among astrophysicists that this paradox may eventually rip a hole in the space-time continuum)

5. Snack-sized Butterfingers

4. Any adult women's costume involving hose or stockings

3. Deck out your house well enough and the Jehovah's Witnesses and/or Mormons may walk right on past without stopping

2. Flaming poop

1. Zero pressure - if you want to skip the holiday completely (except for maybe handing out candy for an hour or taking the kids around the block once or twice in a storebought costume) nobody cares