Neo-Hippie Ramblings - I'm a Non-Conformist Just Like All My Friends: September 2005

Friday, September 30, 2005

Joined the Sunkist Club Today


...as my friend Zak calls it. So now I'm all juice, no seeds.

Actually, the 'no seeds' part takes a while -- you have to ejaculate about 25 times to completely 'clear the chamber', as it were. So I have something to shoot for.

Once that's done, I get to drop off two samples at the lab, two weeks apart. After I get the all clear, no more worrying about birth control. Ever. Woo-hoo!

So now I'm just sitting here hopped up on Darvocet with an ice-pack tucked into my shorts.

One piece of advice for anybody going in for the snip: Shave your own sac beforehand. Really. I was a bit sketchy about doing that, so I left it up to the doctor. Big mistake. The Valium they gave me beforehand did absolutely nothing to take the edge off having my scrotum stretched out and dry-shaven with a Bic. (shudder) As a matter of fact, I'm not sure it did anything at all except to give me really weird dreams while I dozed off waiting for the procedure to start.

The surgery wasn't that painful, really. The worst part has been post-op, feeling like I got kicked in the groin whenever the meds start to wear off. I had a Prince Albert piercing done about 7-8 years ago and that pain was infinitely more intense.

But that's a story for another day...

Thursday, September 29, 2005

Something serious for a change - missing child - update: found

Update: Jordan has been returned to his family, safe and sound.



Jordan Rolfe (birth name) or Jordan Barry (name he chooses to use)
Born: March 10, 1999

Height: 4 feet

Weight: 50 pounds

Hair : Dark Brown, straight, medium-short length

Marks: Scar on middle back, rash (exzema) on right arm and wrist, wart on right thumb.

Last seen wearing a grey shirt with a navy blue collar and blue shorts with orange flames on the sides.

Taken from the city of Strongsville, Ohio. Last seen in Lakewood, Ohio on Clifton Blvd. 9-28-05 at 10:00 a.m. We suspect that she will be trying to make her way either towards Mexico, or Florida.

Nancy Rolfe may be driving a White Chevy conversion van with light blue or green pin stripes. She may also be with a friend who drives a white Honda with black trim. Nancy may be going by the name "Flora" and may have altered her appearance to look like an older woman. Nancy is in her 40's, thin, dark hair and approx. 5'6" tall.

The contact info is:

Detective Sgt. Colegrove
Strongsville Police Dept.
(440) 238-7373

and

Special Agent Timothy J. Kolonick
FBI
(216) 662-6637

If anyone has anything at all to report, please do.

His family are offering a $10,000.00 cash reward to anyone offering any information that leads to his safe return.

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Cheney under doctor's orders to refrain from goose-stepping and/or fellating corporate interests

(my improvements are in red text and today's post is rated NC17 - you have been warned)


WASHINGTON (CNN) -- Vice President Dick Cheney underwent surgery Saturday to remove aneurysms found on the back of both knees.

The procedure lasted six hours and there were no complications. Presently, the vice president is awake, alert, and comfortable, according to a news release from Cheney's office.

It added that after the procedure on Cheney's right knee "went exceedingly smoothly" a decision was made to also repair the aneurysm behind the left knee using a similar technique. Initially, the left knee was to be fixed at a later date.

Jenny Mayfield, of the vice president's office, said doctors in July "identified arterial aneurysms behind both knees."

Cheney later decided to have the "arteries repaired utilizing a minimally invasive endovascular technique."

Mayfield said Cheney expects to resume his normal schedule as soon as he is released to home, with a few exceptions.

"For the time being", said Mayfield, "Cheney must set aside his role as defense-contract whore and jack-booted thug. All the goose-stepping that he's done in the past few years, combined with the stress of kneeling down to suck corporate cock, have simply destroyed his knees."

Cheney is expected to undergo intensive physical therapy in the coming months to restore his contractor-schlong-gobbling prowess.

"We'll start him off slowly, with some head-bobbing exercises and a few padded equipment contracts", explained an unnamed source at the Bethesda Medical Center. "If all goes according to plan, he'll be letting Haliburton jackhammer his tonsils raw within a month. And he'll be back to slinging multi-million dollar no-bid contracts in no time at all. You just can't keep this Dick down."

The original, uninteresting version of the story can be found here.

Sunday, September 25, 2005

The Blackwater Report

Check this out - if Cindy Sheehan is a pie in the face to Bush's credibility, then the Blackwater Report is a Louisville Slugger to the back of his head.

One more link in the chain that's gonna impeach Bush.

Kick-ass stuff, Juju Revolution. Keep up the good work!

Friday, September 23, 2005

What Do News Network Acronyms Stand For?

In case you've ever wondered what the acronyms for CNN, NBC, MSNBC, CBS, ABC, FOX, or C-SPAN stood for, I've put together a handy reference guide:

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

New Snack - Wing Nuts

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

I'm a search engine hit for 'chloroformed mom, sex'

All I can say is a heartfelt 'yuck'.

25-Foot Pig Greets Returning Lawmakers

Ah, my home state of Pennsylvania. If not the pork capital of the US, pretty damned close.

Check out the big pig.

Thanks to The Bastard at Bring It On for the link.

Monday, September 19, 2005

How do you cut down a shrub?





















There's an old saw that project managers like to repeat. It's supposed to help inspire teams that are about to embark on huge projects:
Q. How do you eat an elephant?

A. One bite at a time.
Well, let me suggest an update for the Impeach Bush Coalition:
Q. How do you cut down a shrub?

A. One senator at a time.


Getting the Word Out

That said, we do need to start making Congress aware of our presence.

Earlier this week, Bulldog provided a list of media e-mail addresses to contact. If you haven't pinged him for it already, you should do so tonight! The following is a complement to that list.

E-mail vs. Web Forms

Most members of Congress do not use traditional e-mail addresses. Instead, they capture feedback from the public via web forms. The use of web forms allows them to collect meta-data (who's sending feedback and why) and to filter out spam messages. It takes a bit longer to complete a web form than it does to send an e-mail, so prioritize your efforts.

Every form is a little different, so you'll have to wing it. Once you come up with a message, though, you can cut and paste the text into the main comment box of every form.

Who to Contact
  1. If you only have time to contact two people, make those two people the US Senators who represent your state. Senators pay the most attention to their own constituents, and consider messages originating from elsewhere to be a far lower priority.

  2. Next, contact Senators from the states directly affected by hurricane Katrina and proposed military base closings. These folks and their constituents may already be angry enough to cross well-established party lines and help support impeachment.

  3. Third, contact Democrat and Independent Senators, especially anyone whose name you already recognize as an outspoken critic of the Bush Administration. (Clinton, Kerry, Lieberman, and Reid would be good places to start.)

  4. Finally, contact everyone else that you have time to contact. Even guys like Newt Gingrich have been taking swings at the White House lately, so messages directed to Republican Senators may be worthwhile.
What to Say

Be cordial, honest and brief. Your message will probably be truncated to a hard limit of 1000 characters or so and because of the volume of incoming mail, it's very unlikely that anything past the first 50-100 words or so will be read.

Sample Message

Dear [recipient's name],

I am a member of a group of bloggers called the Impeach Bush Coalition. In the week since this group was formed, approximately 140 blogs have joined. Our goal, of course, is the speedy impeachment of George W. Bush.

I would like to extend you an invitation to visit our site and/or endorse our efforts. Given your standing and influence among [organization or constituency], such an endorsement could prove crucial to our cause.

Our site is here: http://impeachbushcoalition.blogspot.com.

Thank you,

[your name]
The Big Honkin' List of Links

Below is a list of links to all of the US Senators in the 109th Congress -- most open to web forms at senate.gov and a handful open to traditional e-mail addresses:








































































































Senator's NameParty/StateContact Format
Akaka, DanielD - HIE-mail
Alexander, LamarR - TNWeb Form
Allard, WayneR - COWeb Form
Allen, GeorgeR - VAWeb Form
Baucus, MaxD - MTWeb Form
Bayh, EvanD - INWeb Form
Bennett, RobertR - UTWeb Form
Biden, JosephD - DEE-mail
Bingaman, JeffD - NME-mail
Bond, ChristopherR - MOWeb Form
Boxer, BarbaraD - CAWeb Form
Brownback, SamR - KSWeb Form
Bunning, JimR - KYWeb Form
Burns, ConradR - MTWeb Form
Burr, RichardR - NCWeb Form
Byrd, RobertD - WVWeb Form
Cantwell, MariaD - WAWeb Form
Carper, ThomasD - DEWeb Form
Chafee, LincolnR - RIWeb Form
Chambliss, SaxbyR - GAWeb Form
Clinton, HillaryD - NYWeb Form
Coburn, TomR - OKWeb Form
Cochran, ThadR - MSWeb Form
Coleman, NormR - MNWeb Form
Collins, SusanR - MEWeb Form
Conrad, KentD - NDWeb Form
Cornyn, JohnR - TXWeb Form
Corzine, JonD - NJWeb Form
Craig, LarryR - IDWeb Form
Crapo, MichaelR - IDWeb Form
Dayton, MarkD - MNWeb Form
DeMint, JimR - SCWeb Form
DeWine, MikeR - OHWeb Form
Dodd, ChristopherD - CTWeb Form
Dole, ElizabethR - NCWeb Form
Domenici, PeteR - NMWeb Form
Dorgan, ByronD - NDE-mail
Durbin, RichardD - ILWeb Form
Ensign, JohnR - NVWeb Form
Enzi, MichaelR - WYWeb Form
Feingold, RussellD - WIWeb Form
Feinstein, DianneD - CAWeb Form
Frist, BillR - TNWeb Form
Graham, LindseyR - SCWeb Form
Grassley, ChuckR - IAWeb Form
Gregg, JuddR - NHWeb Form
Hagel, ChuckR - NEWeb Form
Harkin, TomD - IAWeb Form
Hatch, OrrinR - UTWeb Form
Hutchison, KayR - TXWeb Form
Inhofe, JamesR - OKWeb Form
Inouye, DanielD - HIWeb Form
Isakson, JohnnyR - GAWeb Form
Jeffords, JamesI - VTWeb Form
Johnson, TimD - SDWeb Form
Kennedy, EdwardD - MAWeb Form
Kerry, JohnD - MAWeb Form
Kohl, HerbD - WIWeb Form
Kyl, JonR - AZWeb Form
Landrieu, MaryD - LAWeb Form
Lautenberg, FrankD - NJWeb Form
Leahy, PatrickD - VTE-mail
Levin, CarlD - MIWeb Form
Lieberman, JosephD - CTWeb Form
Lincoln, BlancheD - ARWeb Form
Lott, TrentR - MSE-mail
Lugar, RichardR - INE-mail
Martinez, MelR - FLWeb Form
McCain, JohnR - AZWeb Form
McConnell, MitchR - KYWeb Form
Mikulski, BarbaraD - MDWeb Form
Murkowski, LisaR - AKWeb Form
Murray, PattyD - WAWeb Form
Nelson, BillD - FLWeb Form
Nelson, BenD - NEWeb Form
Obama, BarackD - ILWeb Form
Pryor, MarkD - ARWeb Form
Reed, JackD - RIWeb Form
Reid, HarryD - NVWeb Form
Roberts, PatR - KSWeb Form
Rockefeller, JohnD - WVWeb Form
Salazar, KenD - COWeb Form
Santorum, RickR - PAWeb Form
Sarbanes, PaulD - MDWeb Form
Schumer, CharlesD - NYWeb Form
Sessions, JeffR - ALWeb Form
Shelby, RichardR - ALE-mail
Smith, GordonR - ORWeb Form
Snowe, OlympiaR - MEE-mail
Specter, ArlenR - PAWeb Form
Stabenow, DebbieD - MIWeb Form
Stevens, TedR - AKWeb Form
Sununu, JohnR - NHWeb Form
Talent, JamesR - MOWeb Form
Thomas, CraigR - WYWeb Form
Thune, JohnR - SDWeb Form
Vitter, DavidR - LAWeb Form
Voinovich, GeorgeR - OHWeb Form
Warner, JohnR - VAWeb Form
Wyden, RonD - ORWeb Form

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Haiku - Naval Research Lab

Naval Research Lab -
Dude, I'm glad you ping my blog
But it wigs me out

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Bushies - New Brand of Diaper



If your baby never seems to stop pooping, have I got a diaper for you: Bushies. Guaranteed to hold even the foulest, stinkiest messes and somehow make them disappear.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

It's a blunderful life


It's a Wonderful Blunderful Life

The scene opens on a snowy bridge over the Potomac River in winter. The wind blows and dark water churns below. George W. Bush, looking weary and haggard, climbs out over the railing.

"I wish I were never born", he murmurs, leaning out toward the water.

There is a loud splash and the camera pans down to a man flailing in the water. George jumps in and pulls him to safety...

Cut to George and Clarence the angel, warming up in front of an old stove at a guardbooth.

"I'm an angel, George", says Clarence, pulling back on his newly dried clothes. "I'm here to grant your wish. Follow me."

"Anything you say, Clare-bear." George gives a thumbs-up and a grin.

"Don't call me that. It's idiotic", says Clarence.

"It's what I do, Clare-bear", says George. "I give people nicknames."

"Shut up, George."

"God likes me, Clarence. I started that there office for faith-based initiatives."

"Yes, George. But right or wrong, you didn't give that office any funding. The Big Guy wasn't impressed."

The scene fades out as George and Clarence leave the guardbooth, and fades back in at the home of a man watching television and drinking a beer.

"That guy looks familiar, Clarence, but I can't place him. Who is that?"

"That's Claude Jones, George. He was convicted of murder based on questionable evidence. When you were governor, you refused his request for a DNA test of the single piece of hair that the prosecution claimed placed him at the crime scene. He was executed. But the guy who served as governor in your place allowed that DNA test, exonerating him."

"I like beer. Think he'd mind if I grabbed a beer?"

"Shut up, George."

Next we see George and Clarence walking through the gates of a cemetery. George scratches his head.

"Gee, Clare-bear, this place looks familiar too. But it's a little different somehow."

"Well, George, it should look familiar. This is one of the cemeteries in Florida where your buddies from SCI were digging up corpses and throwing them in the woods so they could re-sell the plots. You remember, right? It was on the news. You were subpoenaed but resused to testify."

"Oh yeah. Heh, heh. Good times."

"When you weren't around to halt the investigation into SCI's illegal activities in Texas, they were under sufficient scrutiny to prevent the desecration of graves here in Florida. That's why it looks different."

"Guess you could say they had a bone to pick with me."

"Shut up, George."

Clarence and George stand outside a maximum security cell in a federal prison, peeking in at a thin man with a beard and a turban.

"Holy poop on a stick, Clarence! Is that Osama bin Laden???"

"That's right, George. When you weren't around to push your Iraq agenda, the President elected in your place focused instead on bringing Osama bin Laden to justice. It took a few years, but they finally caught him. He goes on trial next month."

"That PATRIOT Act sure did work, huh?"

"Shut up, George. There is no PATRIOT Act. We never needed it."

George and Clarence stand at the back of a crowd that has gathered alongside a convoy of National Guard trucks. Guardsmen are handing out bottled water and MREs.

"Is this Louisiana after the hurricane, Clare-bear?"

"That's right, George. Two days after Katrina."

"But we didn't get there until like four or five days afterward. And how'd all these Guardsmen get here? They're supposed to be protecting our freedom in Iraq."

"Well, in your absence, the President appointed a competent director for FEMA -- somebody who knew how to respond to a pending natural disaster. He mobilized immediately based on the National Weather Service's warning instead of waiting. And we never invaded Iraq, so most of the active guardsmen weren't overseas. They were here to help."

"Hey, I was in the Guard during Vietnam. Helped keep Texas safe from Charlie."

"Shut up, George."

The scene fades out, and then fades back in to a close-up of George and Clarence. They are once again swimming in the icy Potomac River.

"Hey Clare-bear," shouts George, "what gives? Isn't this the part where I'm supposed to go home and hug my family?"

"Sorry, George, I'm under strict orders from the Big Guy. He told me to make sure you jumped in the river. See, the poor have been praying desperately for some kind of relief, and He thought this was the best possible thing He could do for them."

Fade to black.

Clarence's voice is heard to say, "Whenever someone signs the petition to impeach Bush, an angel gets his wings."

Monday, September 12, 2005

The jackals are eating well this week

Whether you agree with the allegations or not, I'm sure you're aware of the charges of war profiteering by Haliburton et al.

Here's something you might not have heard about, though. In the late 90s, when Dubya was still governor of Texas, he was chin-deep in a scandal that ended up being tagged 'Funeralgate'. A mortuary services company called Service Corporation International was caught tossing disinterred bodies into the woods in order to re-sell funeral plots. Bush refused to testify under subpoena as to his involvement in the scandal. Classy, huh?

Well, now. You'll never guess who's been handed a paid contract by FEMA to handle mortuary services in the wake of hurricane Katrina, even though funeral directors in the disaster region offered to perform the same services for free. Yup, a wholly-owned subsidary of SCI called Kenyon International Emergency Services.

In-fucking-credible.

Do try to keep track of the bodies, guys.

Sunday, September 11, 2005

Picked up Koyaanisquatsi and Powaqqatsi on DVD today


... and I'm watching Koyaanisquatsi right now. Oh, freude!

I first saw Koyaanisquatsi while I was in college, living at the House of a Dozen Stoners. It was a rather worn-out VHS copy that had been taped from a PBS broadcast. Even with bad tracking, intermittently poor sound quality and occasional static on a crappy old television, it was still just absolutely incredible, and beautiful, and heartbreaking.

I tried to get ahold of it for years, but it was out of print. At one point, laserdiscs and VHS tapes of decent quality were going for $100+ on eBay, and I just wasn't willing to pay that much. But now it's available on DVD with Powaqqatsi as a set, and I splurged a little on myself. Most of the DVDs I watch these days involve superheroes, animation, giant monsters or talking animals, so it's a nice change.

I haven't watched Powaqqatsi yet (since I last saw it in about 1999), but that's the one that's been in my head a lot lately. The montages of advertising and television violence are just chilling, and the film as a whole is both worldessly eloquent and perfectly timely.

Anyway, I'm going to put an Amazon link in the sidebar and I highly recommend both of these films to anyone for their music, their visual artistry and their message.

Saturday, September 10, 2005

Impeach Bush - You can hide the bodies but not the stench

The quagmire in Iraq has handed an oddly light workload to the spin doctors, so far. The mainstream media is lazy, or scared, or something. But strangely quiet on the subject, regardless.

Perhaps it's a lingering frost from the arctic blast that Ashcroft blew over the press when he likened criticism of the President to treason. Perhaps it's a misguided sense of patriotism. Perhaps it's the fear that questioning the White House these days is tantamount to professional suicide. Or perhaps it's just a gun-shy reaction to the knee-jerk histrionics that the far Right pundits put forth whenever anything remotely critical of Bush policy makes the headlines.

I suspect that all of these things play a role.

Most of all, though, I think that the stranglehold that the Pentagon has maintained over images of war coming from Afghanistan and Iraq have allowed this deadly farce to continue.

We in the United States rely on visual evidence as the standard of truth. That's accurate even here in the blogosphere where text still matters a lot. When we want to make a point, we link to a news source. When we want to really hammer home a point, we link to a video feed.

So in a brilliant strategic move, the Bush administration has done everything it could to hide from the public any and all images of military and civilian deaths. By and large, it's been an unqualified success. Unless you get your news from a source outside the US, your view of all events has been carefully sterilized.

I first noticed this before we invaded Iraq -- back when we were still ostensibly looking for Osama bin Laden in Afghanistan. (You remember, that guy Bush told us wasn't important any more?) At the time, I was reading Debka pretty regularly. They reported repeatedly, and in no uncertain terms, that China had been arming and providing troops to the Taliban.

Now Debka might have an agenda, but it's definitely not a pro-Taliban or pro-China agenda. They'd gain nothing by lying about such a thing. "The shit's gonna hit the fan when the MSM gets ahold of this", I thought.

I waited. Here's what they reported: Nada. Zip. Zilch. Nothing. I never heard a peep about it again, at least from within the US. The media treated it like a flyblown raccoon on the side of the road.

At the time, I gave CNN et al the benefit of the doubt. "Maybe it couldn't be corroborated", I told myself, "or maybe Debka was just mistaken". Over time though, the discrepancies between what the US media reported and what the rest of the world was hearing were such that I could no longer chalk them all up to coincidence.

Case in point: Google up 'Fallujah + napalm' or 'Fallujah + ambulance' and see what you get -- and from respectable sources in the UK, at that. Seriously. Do it now. And don't forget to stop back after the nausea wears off.

Guess what? The guy who was in the checkout line ahead of you today knows nothing about what you just read. Neither did the woman who was stopped next to you in traffic. And nobody's going to tell them, either. To them, it never happened. And they'll be voting for the next President, just like you and me. That gets under my skin. How about you?

Enter hurricane Katrina.

We're hearing now that Bush doesn't want photographs of bodies to be recorded, that news crews are being turned away by the National Guard. Is there good reason to handle horrific images sensitively? Hell yes, we ought to treat our dead with respect and demand the same of the press. But that standard of behavior is the responsibility of the media to uphold and of the court of public opinion to enforce. It is not the proper place for a heavy-handed and unconstitutional edict.

Is there good reason to prevent these images from being captured at all? Sure there is. But only for those with something to hide -- those culpable for the miserable and naked failure to make good on the promises we've been asked to pay billions and surrender important civil liberties to buy: promises of adequate emergency response, promises of effective disaster mitigation, promises of homeland security.

And hot from my inbox... Is it far more sinister than a simple act of damage control?
There are some very troubling developments regarding the collecting of bodies in NOLA. The company hired to do the collection is Kenyon International. Kenyon International is owned by SCI, a major Bush contributor. SCI was involved in a scandal called "Funeralgate" wherein thousands of bodies were improperly and fraudulently disposed of in mass graves of in violation of numerous State and Federal laws on numerous occasions.

Rather than prosecute the company, the then Governor George W Bush and and his campaign manager and future FEMA director Joe Allbaugh seemingly helped the company engage in a coverup. Both Bush and Allbaugh were named as defendants in a lawsuit regarding the issue.

The fact FEMA and the Bush Administration seem to be intent on blocking media coverage of the collection of bodies, and unsubstantiated rumours of "mishandling" of bodies in NOLA already circulating should lead to great concern among the public. Is the Government planning to cover up the number of dead in NOLA as they covered up the Abu Ghraib scandal?

Check this out from Naked Wisdom. (Thanks to Voltima of Naked Wisdom for the preceding link and the quoted message above.)

Friday, September 09, 2005

From No Contact Politics: Natural Disasters: China shows how it's done

From No Contact Politics:

I've resisted running this one for a few days, but I think it's time.

In well planned and implemented operations over the last month, China has evacuated just over 1.24 million people from the country's eastern coast after Typhoon Matsa in early August, and over a million people from the path of super typhoons Talim and Haitang (that's nearly a million people from Zhejiang and Fujian; and over 100,000 people in Anhui) in early September (i.e. right now). And that's just the headlines

I know lots of Americans will find this offensive, and respond with reflexive stuff about freedom and authority, but perhaps they should take a moment to think about it.

From reading right wing blogs on New Orleans, that freedom seems to be freedom to die in the name of individualism & personal responsibility (or for not owning a car) - although where local & federal taxation fits into that picture, I'm not sure.

So, where's all that Homeland Security tax money gone, all the FEMA money, all that military spending, all that GWOT expenditure, if not on defending your homeland?

Surely not into the pockets of corrupt politicans and their political sponsors.
Surely not on the shadow security state and illegal weapons and technologies to oppress and suppress when you finally ask the right questions?

Yup.

Don't believe me? Read the $40 Billion Black Budget for Spying. That's bigger than the annual budgets of nearly all the states in the US, more than the federal government itself spends on justice ($24 billion), Interior ($9 billion), Energy ($23 billion), housing and urban development ($39 billion), NASA ($16 billion),
and about two-thirds of the annual spend on education ($65 billion).

It's even bigger than Homeland Security ($31 billion) expenditure.

Still don't care? Still trust your rulers? I know the answer's still 'yes' for m
any of you reflexive authoritarians on the right, although hopefully your loyalties are beginning to feel a bit of strain right now.

It's
probably lucky for the rest of the world that this will be China's century. The 'American century', the 'age of ideology', will become a fading memory, like the brief flowering of the British Empire, with only the recriminations, trials, tribunals and lawsuits remaining.

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Impeach Bush

At the Bulldog's suggestion, I'd like to reiterate my considered opinion that weed is good and Bush is bad.

Gratuitous Bud Shot:

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Random thought on Labor Day

Wal-Mart hosting a Labor Day sale is kind of like a gang of skinheads hosting a Kwanza celebration.

Monday, September 05, 2005

FEMA Sucks

The FEMA Web site has a rap song for kids. (Your tax dollars at work, folks.)

I'd like to offer a set of alternate lyrics, based on recent events:
Disaster . . . it's what we are,
And you're gonna be sorry if you've got no car.
In a flood, tornado, or a bad plane crash,
You can't depend on us to save your poor, black ass.

If drinking water shows up in a big Mac truck,
We won't let it through 'cause we don't give a fuck.

The government spends millions on our agency
And the job we did in 'Nawlins was a travesty
When disaster strikes, and your skin is brown,
Get a fuckin' helmet, 'cause the shit's comin' down.
Cross posted to Bring It On.

Thursday, September 01, 2005

My mechanic wants to shoot Katrina victims

No, I'm not kidding.

The upside to looking kinda like a young Republican is that I can sometimes talk myself out of a speeding ticket. The downside is that bigots I don't even know have an unfortunate tendency to assume that I share their views and will start spouting whatever racist crap has been festering in their brains without any prompting whatsoever. The only thing I can compare it to is accidentally stepping on something dead and watching the maggots pour out.

So anyway, a mechanic from the repair shop we use is driving me downtown to drop me off at work so that they can have the car for the day. We start talking about the Katrina and the looting that's going on.

His position:

  • Most of the people who didn't leave the disaster area didn't want to leave and in fact probably stuck around to loot.
  • These aren't people like "you and me".
  • Taking anything from a store, even food and water when you're starving, is wrong. Everyone should have been fully prepared ahead of time.
  • He wishes he could be there as a store owner to shoot people who tried to loot from him.

My position:

  • What a dickhead. I kinda felt like clocking him, but he was driving my car downtown in rush hour traffic.